Malfunction pt. 2

She wakes up suddenly. She places her cold feet in the cold floor of their cold loved place. Unusually comfy.

What is she doing?

A voice said in her head, but she goes without thinking ahead to the kitchen to grab a knife.

She is ready to take his life.

Was there really a strife?

The voice asked preoccupied, but she is occupied in dealing with him. She walks slowly towards him brandishing a blade. She’s thinking everything that could do with his fate, then she buries the knife in his chest.

That’s when he wakes up impaled.

That’s when she’s proud of herself.

That’s when she tries to grab the knife to do it all again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

Is she even okay?

I think you know that mate.

The voice grows stronger the more pain is in his chest.

This for her she screams.

For our little baby she screams.

Her image grows darker the more she thinks.

What are you saying? He screams.

You’re fucking crazy he screams.

And then he starts choking in his blood until he no longer speaks.

She stands next to the body while she pulls her blade to her mouth.

She tastes the mix of tears and blood.

Mmm salt and iron just how she remembers.

She’s thinking about doing the same with herself when she hears footsteps.

A little boy asks concerned.

Mom?

She grins from ear to ear.

Come here son.

HAIKUS

Czar's Casino

cu- cu- cu- cuts in my wrists that used to put me on the bloody spot

co- co- co- counting the hours before I get caught

co- co- co- considering how little time I’ve got

cau- cau- cau- cause I can’t remember the last time that I won that I fought

co- co- co- coming up it’s the bullet that will shake the plot

but I won’t start running until I hear the shionhrwef90w43u9

Odium

Two halves don’t make the man, but you still believe that you can be saved so allow me to explain.

I’m gonna get myself dead with this behavior. I’m gonna end lonely with this psyche. Did you think I’m that wholesome? unlikely. How much did you think my soul’s worth? Not pricey.

I’m too blind.

I’m too kind.

I’m too weak

To be able to seek

The true happiness for my sake that I will soon forsake.

I’m too fake.

But future’s so bleak, it be looking so grim.

I’m too green..

Just wanna foresee the sin.

Just wanna scream

And try to read the situation.

Book the expectation of my own imagination with no hesitation of what I’ve left to enquire if I’m the right man, if I’m the right mind.

That’s all the hate I brought upon myself.

And myself is not happy with myself because myself is asking himself whether agree or not with myself and that’s hell so I need help but guess from who

Myself.

OveR

Don’t you start like this.

Don’t you talk your shit.

Don’t you revive old memories and remember that ignorance is bliss.

Don’t you let him confuse you.

You’ve battling yourself enough to recognize a fool.

Don’t assume

Don’t resume

Don’t consume

Don’t trust

yourself.

Don’t help nobody if you don’t wanna to be bodied.

Don’t keep thinking about others.

 You won’t be rewarded in the same way

 you won’t receive nothing, no flowers.

Don’t you do it for prizes.

Don’t you do it for fame.

You’ll do it for your people’s sake and nothing more, no shame.

Don’t you see how they all live above you?

Don’t you notice how they pity you even if you don’t want it to?

Don’t fall for them, you’re better than that.

You know how easy is to be a happy asshole so be it and throw the rest to hell.

It’s the best place to let your demons go.

Don’t you grant him what he wants.

He’s the worst part of you, the selfish one.

Don’t  you trust the guy who claims to know the truth that he just simply haunts.

Don’t help him to cause more suffering that the one that he’s done.

Don’t listen to him, he’s just weak.

Don’t forget what I say and you’ll reach your peak.

Don’t you make enemies, you have enough with yourself.

Instead of telling your problems to anybody you should keep all to you and to nobody else.

Don’t follow his rules.

Don’t follow his moves.

Don’t be like that.

Don’t go with his path.

Don’t try to fix who’s right.

Don’t try to change who’s left.

Just live